Thought of the Day

Sometimes I think it would be easier to like women. I honestly believe that men, in general, avoid thinking with their heads and revert to using their penis for brainpower.

Disclaimer, if you read my blog I'm not referring to you (that would make me silly indeed!)

There are a few things in life I truly dislike. I would even go so far as to say 'hate', which, if you know me, is a word I hesitate to use. Let me elaborate and explain, so please join me for a frustrating ride...

1) Laziness
I understand that people have lazy days, and that's fine. I enjoy a day spent entirely in my PJs where I eat popcorn off my belly, and occasionally pick up a kernel from my cleavage. But I can't stand the 'lazy gene'. By this I mean a debilitating medical condition that prevents a person from seeking employment, bothering to make time for their friends and sitting back whilst watching others perform work of some sort (you know, chores, sexual favours and the like). I find males fit into this category quite well.

2)Being taken advantage of
I don't mind helping my friends out. Admittedly, there is some degree of selfishness when I agree to assist someone because I tend to expect a 'cash in' at some stage - karma and all that jazz. I suppose what defines a 'user' is when a person (friend or otherwise, usually otherwise) demands multiple, often regular, favours without returning the goodwill. What's worse is when they doesn't realise they're doing it. They think you enjoying helping them all the time with no reward, recognition or rest and expect you to be grateful for doing so. I'm only just learning to be a 'no' person and can see the value of being a professional hermit.

3)People with no emotional IQ
Emotional IQ (generally) relates to how well you can empathise with others. Often people low in emotional IQ don't realise the affects they have on others because they simply can't comprehend emotional situations and responses. Think: 'sure I just yelled at you like you are a contestant on The Biggest Loser who just got busted eating a super sized Big Mac meal, but why are you crying?' I hate this category the most because, other than sending them to therapy for 20 years, they won't change as they don't see anything wrong with their way of life and are often quick to post blame on the behaviours of others.

Breathe..... think of Orlando Bloom......

..........

In 1999 I recieved a present I had been wishing for. It was a late birthday present from my friend Matt, and it was exactly what I wanted. It was a video of the film '10 Things I Hate About You', a film that appealed to my teenage angst, desires and morals. Plus I was completely in love with Heath Ledger, who I thought was the biggest spunk in the world.

My infatuation did not end that year, and continued into the new millenium. For my year 10 Health class we were instructed to create a baby book. It had to look realistic and the content had to be accurate (as though I had actually given birth - quite an interesting task for a 16 year old!). My husband on the 'birth certificate' was Heath Ledger and our baby was called Cassie Ledger. The book signified a teenage girl's dream - to marry and make a family with her Hollywood idol.

Today, upon learning of the death of Heath Ledger my mouth fell ajar. I was shocked - he was my crush. This couldn't happen to him!? My adult mind understands the tragedy of the situation - he was only 28 years old and he has a 2 year old daughter who will never know her father - but in reverting back to my teenage memories it truly feels like a kick in the guts. Only old people die, right?

Caution: Hibernating 'Children'

Today I built a cubby and it made me remember how simplistic and enjoyable childhood was. I made it with minimal help from 5 year old O'man - I made him think he made it , but the architectural design was all my idea. I was even (secretly) chuffed when my partner came in to see it and exclaimed how great it was and that it was 'the best cubbyhouse in the world!' I believed him, of course, and relished in my greatness. I even took photos.
After 5 minutes O'man wanted to watch Who Framed Roger Rabbit and humoured me when I asked him what he thought of the cubby, stating "good, it's really good" whilst leaving it uninhabited. Which now means I must return to adulthood....

Needles and Cupcakes

A trade off for having a profession that is physically, emotionally and socially draining is that I get a very long holiday over summer. I get to enjoy activities that I don’t normally have time for and I feel refreshed and 100% better about myself. Some highlights of my holidays include:

• Baking/cooking things I would otherwise not attempt due to time constraints. My attempts of cooking would make Jamie Oliver cry like the British sissy that he is. I tend to find a recipe, read it, dismiss it, and make my own version. Inevitably, I often fail, although the result can be quite scrumptious. For example, my Devil’s Food Triple Choc Chip Cup Cakes were to die for (literally – they included 250g of butter).
  
  


• Getting my makeup done professionally. Just 'because'. And then spending the equivalent of a pair of new runners on *cough* two *cough* items of makeup.
  



• Spoiling myself with massages (although I only booked in because I got a ‘buy one get one free’ voucher – my frugality has definitely paid off in this instance).
  
• Seeing movies (read about my most recent experience below)
  
• Going to the beach, and not getting sunburnt (which is quite a feat considering I am whiter than Michael Jackson)
  
• Lying on a couch watching the BBC series of ‘Sense and Sensibility’ for five hours (and then barely being able to move afterwards).
  

Last night I went and saw a film at the gorgeous Balwyn cinemas. I had absolutely no knowledge of the story or genre so I was a bit anxious (as I am a bit of a baby when it comes to horror or thriller films – I still leave the light on at night after watching them). Turns out it was a thriller, with lots of people getting shot with some sort of oxygen device (yes, this sounds odd, but it was a quiet, effective weapon. And by effective I mean there was lots of blood and lots of blood = death). Well, do you think I watched the violence developing on the big screen? Hell no! Meanwhile, there was a scene later on involving the baddie injecting himself with a pain killer after he had been shot in the leg. I looked on in fascination. I turned to my left, I turned to my right and both of my buddies (who I won’t mention because I value their friendship) were peering through their fingers like Freddy Kruger had jumped from the big screen and was about to slice their carotid arteries. I find it utterly fascinating that people (and I mean this in a general sense) can distance themselves from films in which technology can make decomposing corpses, decapitated heads and gutted carcasses look disturbingly realistic, but a needle sends my boyfriend (woops! I did say my ‘friends’ would be anonymous, didn’t I?) into the foetal position.

Well, I suppose that is an adequate update for now. You must feel quite enriched for reading about my life. Now go and do something productive with your time, like visit Facebook.